To Say or Not To Say... That is the Decision

Apply these 3 questions when deciding when to speak up or shut up.

We all go through life each day making many decisions about what we say or not say. Often we must consciously decide to remain silent versus to speak our mind, to share an opinion, to provide information, or to render advice. I recommend asking yourself these three questions when making the decision to say something or to just remain quiet:

1. Does it NEED to be said?

2. Does it need to be said by me?

3. Does it need to be said now? (versus some other time)

These three questions form a thought process to aid in making your frequent decisions on what to say or not say. We have all heard the sage advice to "think before you speak." This is very true, but what do you think about prior to making the decision to say something or to remain quiet? (say it or not?)

Think of each of these three questions as a "trap door" that should be passed through affirmatively before going on to the next question.

If the answer to question #1 is "NO" (it does NOT NEED to be said). Stop right there and don't say anything else. Don't bother going to question #2. Many people let their mouths get them into trouble by saying things that there are really no need to say. Keep this old adage in mind: "Few people get into trouble for what they do not say." If you err, err on the side of caution and say less rather than saying too much. Avoid TMI and avoid being a gossip.

If the answer to question #1 is "YES" (something NEEDS to be said), then go on to question #2.

Question #2 really asks "am I the right person to say what NEEDS to be said?" If the answer to question #2 is "NO," then don't let what NEEDS to be said come from you. You can choose to remain totally silent or get involved in finding the right person to deliver the message that NEEDS to be said. Be aware of the "sin of omission" as well as the "sin of commission." Sometimes, remaining totally silent on something important that NEEDS to be said is not the right thing to do, but you might not be the right person to say it.

Question #3 is all about the timing of delivering a message that NEEDS to be said by YOU. Again, if your answer to question #2 is "NO" and you are not the right person to say it, then stop right there and don't say anything else. Don't worry about the timing of something that does not need to be said or not said by you.

Apply this process using these three questions consciously and skillfully in your life. These three questions can help you decide "what to say or not to say."

Thank you for taking your time to read this post. I value your feedback and rating in the Comments Box in the section below the Recent Posts. My goal as a life coach is "to help people learn how to live a truly blessed life." My blog posts on www.BlessedLife4U.com fall into the four categories of 1) Spiritual Law, 2) Christian Principles, 3) Servant Leadership, and 4) Life Lessons. Thanks again for reading, rating and sharing these materials.